In the newspaper’s annual article about how stylish New York City beachgoers are, Guy Trebay recounts the following quote that he overheard on his recent trip to the Far Rockaway boardwalk: “I was, like, I really want to get eyelash extensions, but my friend said: ‘Don’t! You’ll get obsessed and addicted and they just fall out!’ So now I want to get an eyelash perm instead!” Sigh, there’s no safe space for discussing eyelash perms.