We are seriously worried about the fate of our nation’s tween girls. First Hannah Montana inspires them to get grown-up manicures, and now Avril Lavigne is going to make stuff for them to wear? WWD reports Lavigne will partner with Kohl’s to launch “Abbey Dawn, a juniors’ lifestyle brand.” The stuff will hit stores in July for the back-to-school shopping rush and will be rock-and-roll-inspired. The brand will start with apparel and jewelry and add more products as it rolls out new collections every two months. The idea of an army of Little Lavignes running around the country leaves us in a fit of unease. If we were walking down the street and saw a couple of 12-year-old girls in pin-striped pants, we’d roll our eyes; if we saw them in those pants with fingerless leather gloves and pink streaks in their hair, we’d be too scared to walk on the same side of the street as them; and if we overheard them saying “fuck” and giggling, we might just give up going out all together.
On the bright side, maybe they can take on all the 12-year-old girls dressed in Heidi Montag’s clothing line. It could be like the Sharks and Jets invading our nation’s junior highs.