We can’t help but have a crush on Kathy Griffin. See, we think she “gets it” in the same way we do, which is hard to find, especially on the pages of a fashion magazine, but in the April Elle — their “Smart Women” issue — Griffin gives us four reasons to love her in all her self-effacing glory:
1. She was fired from Hannah Montana.
“I was going to be a big guest star on Hannah Montana and I blew that with my Jesus joke. I ran into someone who works at the show at the writers’ strike and I go, “When are we going to do that Hannah Montana episode?” And he said, “Honey, the instructions literally came down, ‘We don’t want her anywhere near the building.’”
2. She took billionaire Über-geek boyfriend Steve Wozniak, Apple co-founder, to Celine Dion in Las Vegas.
“He loves live entertainment. I took him to see Celine Dion, and I was teasing him, sending him these e-mails: “When we’re in Vegas this weekend, I’d love to take you to see a singer. Her name is Celine Dion. You’ve probably never heard of her, but she’s quite popular around the world. She is French-Canadian.” And he would write back [starts talking in robot voice], “I have never seen Celine Dion but I have heard her name. In fact, I do not know any of her songs but several of my friends tell me rest assured I will recognize them … [A]t the end of Celine when he didn’t cry, I was convinced his heart was made of coal. He kept saying things like [back to robot voice] I absolutely appreciate her excellent vocal skills.”
3. When she gets fired, she thinks it’s a joke.
[W]hen I’m fired I have to be fired five times. When I was fired from E! — for my ill-timed Dakota Fanning joke — I kept thinking they were kidding. I was like, You are such a riot, see you at rehearsal! And then by the third call they were all, No, really, you’re fired.
4. She thinks Suzanne Somers is amazing.
She’s the oracle for me. She is to me what the Dalai Lama is to Richard Gere… She has it all figured out. You know she’s rich as fuck; she’s got an airplane … Air Somers? Oh, yeah. You will not see Suzanne Somers at a commercial airport.
The Last Laugh [Elle (not online)]