We admit we weren’t expecting anything this exciting from the latest American Apparel e-mail touting “Exciting New Styles,” but how wrong we were to underestimate the sexually charged company. After clicking through images of floral swimwear and men’s bow ties, it all looked like standard hipster protocol. But, suddenly, amid the photos of new merch, we clicked open a JPEG to reveal a thrilling new addition to the American Apparel line: assless tights. The tights appear to be the same pantyhose the store has been selling for a while now, except this special style reveals your bum. Classy! The tights are still in production, so you can’t run out and buy a pair just yet. But we wonder if, come August, all the girls in Williamsburg will take to the streets cheeks out. What’s next, Dov? Crotchless bodysuits? And with that lovely image in our heads, we’ll be spending the weekend as proper fashion gals should: breaking out our best nauticals and drinking prosecco. See you guys on Tuesday.