a rare post on sports

Rafael Nadal Is Competing in the U.S. Open in See-through Shorts?

Notice the blatant curvature of the thigh muscle.

The New York Post noticed that Rafael Nadal will be the only top-seeded tennis player in the U.S. Open not to have a day and night court look. However, they did notice that his shorts, which happen to be black, are sheer and “slightly see-through.” Heavens. Could this be fact? We turned to party reporter extraordinaire Mike Vilensky, who attended Nike’s preview of the Open uniforms they created for Nadal and his competitors. At first he said, “I probably would have noticed that, so I’m going to go with wishful thinking on the part of the Post. But maybe in the right light?”

But then Mike, reporter extraordinaire don’t you forget, dug a little deeper, noticing in the photo we posted with his report last week, “If you stare at his left thigh, you see it go up past his shorts!” He further clarifies, “If you follow his body past his knee, you can continue to see his thigh muscles through the shorts in that photo we ran.” Why, he’s exactly right! And as Nike explains in the press materials about Rafa’s ensemble, “Nike Dri-FIT Mesh is incorporated in strategic places for breathability to keep Nadal cool.” The area below the waist would qualify as a strategic place, would it not?

A funny feeling has come over us. We can’t be sure, but we think — just maybe — it’s called suddenly caring about sports. He is life-changing, that Spaniard.

Rafael Nadal Is Competing in the U.S. Open in See-through Shorts?