David Beckham has decided not to renew his contract with Emporio Armani underwear. Before you freak out about the UNFAIRNESS OF LIFE, do know Beckham is reportedly looking for a deal to create his own underwear line, so, depending on how long it takes him to land a contract, there will perhaps be no seasonal lapses in new giant billboards of David Beckham in tight little shorts. But you can see how if David continued with Armani, that might present a conflict of underwear interest. Yet there are no conflicts of underwear interest in Beckham’s replacement, fellow soccer player Cristiano Ronaldo, who is 24 years old, comes from Portugal, and must come with a sexy-enhancing accent. He plays for Spanish club Real Madrid and the national Portuguese team. If you can’t wait for Cristiano’s Armani ads, you’re in luck, because soccer is that wonderful kind of sport where players rip their shirts off from time to time (this is often to celebrate a goal or trade jerseys with the opposing team after an international match).* So there are plenty of shirtless pictures of Ronaldo out there to ogle. Also, he appears to enjoy spending time by pools and oceans.
*This is where Gchat and people who actually know things about sports come in handy.