Nothing makes me feel more predictable and impotent than hating Chris Brown. From his assault-and-battery-commemoration tattoo to his terrorist Halloween costume, Brown’s insistent existence is so mind-bogglingly repugnant that I can’t think of anything to do but quietly fume, try to ignore him, and hope not to develop unhealthy (for me) and paternalistic feelings about his pop star victim/girlfriend Rihanna. Which is why I’m glad Jenny Johnson exists.
A former television news producer, Johnson writes essays for GQ and Grantland and, according to this Houston Press Q&A, is working on a book about growing up. After more than a year of needling Brown on Twitter with @-reply provocations about his domestic abuse of Rihanna (a hobby she explains here), Johnson sent the 23-year-old Chris Brown into a self-destructive and inventively scatological Twitter fit last night. It ended with Brown deactivating his account while his fans sent a bunch of poorly spelled death threats to Johnson. Which makes her something like the Twitter equivalent of the friend who, sick of your whining about your bad ex-boyfriend, simply steals your phone and deletes his number. Cherish her.