With his jolly stomach and that twinkle in his eyes, you know Saint Nick is up for just about any naughty thing you could think of. Plus, he already knows everything you’ve done, so no judgments. Have a seat on his lap, make a wish, and enjoy the fruits of his labor. Santa’s not for everybody, but sometimes it’s fun to be with a “big boy,” because it makes all of us who’ve been inhaling sugar cookies for a month feel like dainty flowers.
Merry Christmas, male gazers, may you all get exactly what you most desire this holiday. We’ll return to our regularly scheduled programming on the 26th.