On Friday, Sports Illustrated’s plan to reveal its Swimsuit Issue cover on the Late Show With David Letterman — as is tradition — was foiled when the image featuring Kate Upton leaked online. (Rest assured the magazine is investigating the breach and “instantly … began to assess the situation and its implications,” like seeing more Upton sideboob four days ahead of schedule.) Still, Letterman had a bunch of this year’s models on his program last night and let them read his Top Ten list. The theme: questions on the application for becoming a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model. Now, allow us to spoil it for you! Subjectively speaking, what follows are the funniest ones:
9. Asked by Nina Agdal: “Have you dated Charlie Sheen?”
3. Asked by Genevieve Morton: “Are you willing to visit the elderly at his late night talk show?”
2. Asked by Helen of Troy of Football, Katherine Webb: “How would Brent Musburger describe you?”
Upton recited No. 1, of course, which was, “Where’s the strangest place you’ve found sand?” Bo-ring. Letterman forgot: “Would you be willing to travel to Antarctica and pose in only a winter jacket and bathing suit bottoms, while it’s 35 degrees below zero and you’re inexplicably standing next to someone in an Oreo costume?” And, “How do you feel about teenage boys using — ” NEVER MIND.