Ahead of the U.K.’s Red Nose Day (a countrywide “fundraising event organised by Comic Relief every two years” to “make a difference to the lives of countless people across Africa and the UK who are facing terrible injustice or living in desperate poverty,” according to its website), Kate Moss stopped by her friend Nick Grimshaw’s Radio 1 breakfast show to read a passage from E. L. James’s Fifty Shades of Grey. A little background: The station promised that if it raised £200,000, it would get Moss to “open that mouth of hers and talk to the world.” Before she commenced, she admitted she was nervous: “Yeah, yeah! … It’s so weird … There’s a reason I don’t talk.” Grimshaw asked why. “I don’t know!”
With piano accompaniment, Kate read:
He steps out of his shoes and reaches down to take each of his socks off, never taking his eyes off me. I am rendered speechless by the look of hunger in his eyes. Wow … to be wanted by this Greek god. I mirror his actions and step out of my black flats. Suddenly, he reaches for me, backing me up against the wall. Kissing me, my face, my throat, my lips … running his hands through my hair. I feel the cool, smooth tiled wall at my back, and the chill of the ceramic. Tentatively, I place my arms on his upper arms, and he groans as I squeeze tightly.
Upon finishing, she burst into laughter and nearly threw herself over the back of her seat. Grimshaw shouted, “The country can’t carry on anymore!” and someone off-camera barked like a dog several times. All reasonable reactions.