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grammys 2014
January 27, 2014

The Fug Girls: The Best, Worst, and Snazziest Looks From the Grammys

By The Fug Girls

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Photo: Getty Images

For a show that bills itself as music’s biggest night, the prevailing sentiment after watching the red-carpet portion of Sunday night’s Grammys was, “… That’s it?!” Star power felt very low: We knew Beyoncé was in the building, that Julia Roberts was presenting, and that Kanye and Justin Timberlake were nominated. And yet they all gave the pre-show pageantry a pass, leaving it largely in the hands of newbies. (Do people want to avoid Giuliana that much?) Fortunately for us, though, that means the crazy clothes outweighed the classy ones, and for once, the guys seemed to be on a creative wavelength the ladies couldn’t match. Join us as we share with you the standouts — good and bad — from the red carpet.

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The Fug Girls: The Best, Worst, and Kookiest at the 2014 SAG Awards
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1 / 17 Photos
Most Surprisingly Classy: Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose No offense to Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose, but she once went outside wearing a dres... Most Surprisingly Classy: Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose No offense to Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose, but she once went outside wearing a dress made primarily of string, and the night before the Grammys, he wore sweat-shorts to a party and looked extremely... shall we say "relaxed." So we were pleasantly startled to see the two of them looking very glamorous and put-together, even if his interview was still a parade of monosyllables. Baby steps.  Photo: Steve Granitz/Getty Images
Most On-The-Nose AND Off-The-Mark: Katy Perry This Valentino only just hit the catwalks and already it's on the red carpet. Katy Perry is exactly... Most On-The-Nose AND Off-The-Mark: Katy Perry This Valentino only just hit the catwalks and already it's on the red carpet. Katy Perry is exactly the person we'd expect to wear a whimsical ode to music on Grammy night, and could have been exactly the person to pull it off -- except, despite the graceful fun of the print itself, the design is an overwrought tulle box: too much tutu, too little lining, too bad.  Photo: Getty Images
Most Twee: Kacey Musgraves Something about Kacey Musgraves' cutesy pink tiered confection has us thinking of magic wands, tinkling bells and fair... Most Twee: Kacey Musgraves Something about Kacey Musgraves' cutesy pink tiered confection has us thinking of magic wands, tinkling bells and fairy dust. Unfortunately, we're allergic to dust and those bells are giving us a headache. Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images
Worst Ad For Spring Break: Sara Bareilles  It's not that we particularly like Sara Bareilles's molting Blumarine mullet dress; we don't. But... Worst Ad For Spring Break: Sara Bareilles  It's not that we particularly like Sara Bareilles's molting Blumarine mullet dress; we don't. But the more egregious offense may be her gnarled braided updo, which makes her look one Jell-O shot in Cancun away from getting a really dumb tattoo someplace she can't hide.  Photo: Getty Images
Snazziest: Macklemore and Ryan Lewis  On a night where the red carpet was, as we mentioned, disappointingly devoid of drama – can someone we... Snazziest: Macklemore and Ryan Lewis  On a night where the red carpet was, as we mentioned, disappointingly devoid of drama – can someone wear an egg up in here, please? – it was nice to see Macklemore and Ryan Lewis bringing both color and pattern to their otherwise classic suit silhouettes. Men rarely have the stones to wear either, much less both. Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images
Worst Ad For Pink: Pink We love Pink. We love her voice, her acrobatics, her attitude, and her strength (she flipped that guy like it was easy). ... Worst Ad For Pink: Pink We love Pink. We love her voice, her acrobatics, her attitude, and her strength (she flipped that guy like it was easy). But this dull, cheap-looking red gown -- and its lackluster styling -- are a poor representation of how interesting and talented she actually. Be your own billboard, Pink. Nobody will sell you better than you do. And leave the strapless satin bridesmaid gowns to the rest of them. Photo: ROBYN BECK/AFP/Getty Images
Worst Rebranding: Tristan Wilds Remember adorable Tristan Wilds, a.k.a. Michael from The Wire (or Dixon on the rebooted 90210, if you actually wa... Worst Rebranding: Tristan Wilds Remember adorable Tristan Wilds, a.k.a. Michael from The Wire (or Dixon on the rebooted 90210, if you actually watched that)? Well, he was nominated for Best Urban Contemporary Album under the performance name "Mack Wilds," yet unfortunately for him, decided to come dressed as refried Dwayne Wayne. It IS a different world, yes, but let's not go that far, dude.  Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images
Best of the Night: Taylor Swift This golden Gucci is perfect on Taylor Swift. It's all things Taylor Swift stands for: shiny, glittery, girly goo... Best of the Night: Taylor Swift This golden Gucci is perfect on Taylor Swift. It's all things Taylor Swift stands for: shiny, glittery, girly goodness, but finally cut with a welcome edge of sophistication. Bonus points for those short sleeves, which look fresh on something so formal. She's never looked better. Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images
Good Things Come in Small Packages Award: Kevin Hart Kevin Hart had a rough red carpet. On E!, Giuliana Rancic kept crouching to talk to him as i... Good Things Come in Small Packages Award: Kevin Hart Kevin Hart had a rough red carpet. On E!, Giuliana Rancic kept crouching to talk to him as if he were a child, and then she started caressing his face, like he was her favorite doll. It was bizarre, to say the least. But the good news for him is that at least she infantilized him while he was wearing a legitimately groovy blazer. Photo: Lester Cohen/Getty Images
Best Adaptation To His Surroundings: Jared Leto  Thanks to his recent awards run, we forgot Jared Leto even had a band until he came rolling... Best Adaptation To His Surroundings: Jared Leto  Thanks to his recent awards run, we forgot Jared Leto even had a band until he came rolling up with the rest of 30 Seconds to Mars. But bless him for remembering that the Grammys is where he plays a musician, and showing up dressed like one: all dark skinny pants, kind of f'ed up boots, a shirt tied around his waist. The magic of him is that his hair works in all settings, and we generally don't even LIKE ombre tresses. Photo: Jeff Vespa/Getty Images
Stalest: Ariana Grande  Poor Ariana Grande has got to get a new stylist. She looks exactly the same at every single event – and it's not jus... Stalest: Ariana Grande  Poor Ariana Grande has got to get a new stylist. She looks exactly the same at every single event – and it's not just thanks to her hair, which she claims she always wears the same way due to damage. She's being dressed up like a doll, including (ugh) shiny nude hose and satin shoes.  And while this Dolce & Gabbana dress is objectively pretty, the combined effect is giving us a cavity. Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images
Most Tiresome: Madonna Madonna's son David Banda might have been the best-dressed person on the red carpet, but we've seen this menswear-inspired... Most Tiresome: Madonna Madonna's son David Banda might have been the best-dressed person on the red carpet, but we've seen this menswear-inspired look on her many times before, not to mention her ridiculous grill and her one gloved hand. Madonna used to be the master of self-reinvention. Where did that version of her go? Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images
Most Predictable: Paula Patton  Our dream is, one day, to be able to write the words, "Paula Patton looked elegant and understated in a... Most Predictable: Paula Patton  Our dream is, one day, to be able to write the words, "Paula Patton looked elegant and understated in a simple gown designed to highlight her natural beauty." But that day is pretty much never going to come, right? Photo: Getty Images
Most Noteworthy Accessory: Pharrell  It's not an awards show if it doesn't spawn at least one parody Twitter account. This Grammys, that hon... Most Noteworthy Accessory: Pharrell  It's not an awards show if it doesn't spawn at least one parody Twitter account. This Grammys, that honor went to Pharrell and his giant, ridiculous hat, the likes of which we haven't seen since that summer we spent with the Canadian Mounties (read: we watched a lot of Due South). Ah, memories.  Photo: Christopher Polk/Getty Images
Best Glow: Ciara Ciara has worn some crazy get-ups in her time. But, refreshingly, she picked a gold gown that's so glamorous and flattering that... Best Glow: Ciara Ciara has worn some crazy get-ups in her time. But, refreshingly, she picked a gold gown that's so glamorous and flattering that she'd have looked just as fabulous in it if she weren't pregnant.  Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images
Least Welcome Return: Paris Hilton  Can people please stop inviting Paris to these things? Seriously. Whether covered up or letting it all h... Least Welcome Return: Paris Hilton  Can people please stop inviting Paris to these things? Seriously. Whether covered up or letting it all hang out--and somehow this dress is both--we don't need to see her anymore. Any of her. Anywhere.  Photo: Getty Images
Most Inexplicably Not Awful: Zendaya Teen singer Zendaya is essentially wearing a blouse whose pockets are her nipples' only defense against flas... Most Inexplicably Not Awful: Zendaya Teen singer Zendaya is essentially wearing a blouse whose pockets are her nipples' only defense against flashbulbs and eyeballs. And yet somehow -- whether it's how tall the skirt makes her look, or its cute color, or the way it ties together with the top -- this is not as ragingly scary as it should be. Or is this our Stockholm Syndrome talking? Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images
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