Jared Leto Could Not Keep It Together at the Vanity Fair Party

Jared Leto: a grown-up professional. (Jon Kopaloff/Getty Images) Photo: Jon Kopaloff/Getty Images

Hey, is that your boyfriend? The guy with the hair? The only one in the lavender suit. You know who I’m talking about, the guy who is freaking everyone the eff out. Yes. Jared Leto. I didn’t want to name-drop. Anyway, a couple of us were wondering if you maybe thought it was time to call him a car, or take him home, or maybe just sit him down for a little water and a piece of bread. Oh, he always acts like an unapologetic puppy that just devoured a bag of espresso beans? Ah. How much fun for you. Oh, yes, you can definitely tell that deep down he’s super-mellow. Of course. Enjoy the rest of your night.

Jared Leto Couldn’t Keep It Together Last Night