This New Dating App Will Ruin Your Internet Game

Photo: Uwe Umstaetter/Westend61/Corbis

The best photo of me was taken about a few years ago: I will never again look so young, so free, or so skinny as I was in that shot. Do I still use that fairly blatant misrepresentation of my current self on my OKCupid profile? You bet I do. 

Unfortunately, a Swedish dating site called 7Heaven wants to ruin my internet game by only hosting photos of members that were taken in the last six hours. It can check timestamps. Don’t even try to trick it; it’s smarter than us.

Users can upload new ones as they want to, but only if they were recently snapped. It doesn’t matter who you are now — bald, chubby, with bad bangs, a bad haircut, or a new tattoo — 7Heaven only wants that authentic, current self presented to potential suitors. That seems like so much work! Trying to get yourself dating-site-selfie-ready every six hours?

At first I thought, Chill out! How much does a person actually change in six hours? But then I remembered the disparity between how I look at work and how I look when I come home at night, take off my pants, remove my makeup, and fall asleep on the couch for a few hours before I start Tindering. Maybe six hours is too long a time period.

This New Dating App Will Ruin Your Internet Game