dong watch

Men Trying Their Darnedest to Regrow Foreskin

Photo: Henrik Sorensen/Getty Images

For some men, circumcision is a theft straight out of the womb: They were robbed of their foreskins before they even had the verbal skills to say, “Hey, whoa there, doc, I might want that extra flesh someday.”

But, as the New Times Broward-Palm Beach informs us, the circumcised aren’t doomed to their fate forever. A group of men in south Florida have been trying as hard as they can to regenerate what was once taken from them — precisely “one-third of the erogenous tissue on the penile shaft” — by using various tugging devices (like something called the TLC Tugger) to stretch the penile skin the same way a gauge would stretch an earlobe. Except this sounds way worse:

But regenerating an inch of skin is an almost superhuman feat. A foreskin can’t simply grow back like a lizard’s tail; it takes one to five years of grueling stretching and a slew of strange devices. It’s physically torturous and also isolating, because most men take on restoring without talking to loved ones or doctors. Many turn to online forums for guidance and support. And most quit before reaching their goal.

After reading a vivid description like that, one’s imagination can’t help but conjure images of men hunched in agony, furiously tugging their junk, chanting “we must, we must, we must increase our foreskins.” But in reality we have no idea what this process actually looks like.

The New Times Broward-Palm Beach illustrated it thus:

Photo: New Times Broward - Palm Beach

But what if one of these is more accurate?

Photo: John Slater/Getty Images
Photo: Andy Reynolds/Getty Images

Or maybe it’s more like this?

Photo: Henrik Sorensen/(c) Henrik Sorensen
Photo: Andy Reynolds/Getty Images

Or maybe more akin to homemade-pizza night?

Photo: Adam Gault/Getty Images

Could be this:

Photo: Ben Richardson/(c) Ben Richardson
Photo: clapczyn/Getty Images

Regardless: The tug strug is real.

Photo: Salman Usmani
Men Trying Their Darnedest to Regrow Foreskin