Light your most fragrant candle and cue up “Eternal Flame” in honor of our recently fallen favorite Kappa, Jennifer the Candle Vlogger. She burned too brightly for Ryan Murphy’s world.
While she was never going to help us finger the killers (to be fair, though, nobody on this show can), Jennifer — a.k.a. “that really odd girl with the unusual candle fetish” — brought a weird, wonderful, and uncomfortably obsessive corner of the internet to mainstream television. She represented those hobbyist Yankee Candle collectors who sojourn to their mecca (Deerfield, MA) each year to make 20-minute Black Friday haul videos, and the Bath and Body Works candle fanatics who can sniff out the difference between a winter-scented candle and a holiday-scented candle at the first light of the wick. For that we salute her.
Jennifer the Candle Vlogger, we’ll never forget how you willingly framed someone for murder just to get her cast-off Diptyque candles. (They were full-size after all.) And when you vividly described a BBW candle as “the Nancy Myers Experience” because it smelled of “creamy couches and menopause,” I could smell it, too.
At least you were brutally murdered doing what you love. We light one for you and your final vlog. May it one day become as viral as the Peach Bellini Candle Rant. (You got killed in it, so it probably will.)