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Hello, Adele’s Hot Bodyguard, It’s Me

Adele and Van der Veen.
Adele and Van der Veen. Photo: Raymond Hall/Getty Images

In a genius stroke of viral marketing for her new album 25, Adele has hired Lady Gaga’s old bodyguard, Peter Van der Veen. And honestly? After seeing photos of him wearing the crap out of a sleek button-down and carrying a puppy, I would not be surprised if every love song Adele ever wrote was secretly about him.

Van der Veen used to be of those grossly muscly guys who paint their bodies bronze, but everybody has embarrassing things in their past. We forgive you.