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Only Martha Stewart Is Allowed to Hoverboard

The hoverboarding goddess herself, Ms. Martha Stewart
The hoverboarding goddess herself, Ms. Martha Stewart

Martha Stewart, clad in an oversize tunic, gracefully slides across the marble floor on her pal Aziz’s hoverboard*. An unknown man, perhaps a past lover or an assistant or both, holds her hand to keep her steady. After all, she’s had a glass or two of Champagne. And the anonymous man is just backup, for hoverboarding is “really easy,” Stewart coos. Her only concern is the antiques that surround her; she doesn’t want to break them. But so what if she does? Through their destruction, she’ll be creating a new history, forever claiming her place in the hoverboard hall of fame.

*This post has been corrected to show that the owner of the hoverboard is Aziz al Nasser, not Aziz Ansari.

Only Martha Stewart Is Allowed to Hoverboard