I’m Too Tired to Fight Back Against a Device That Lets You Pull Your Suitcase With Your Butt

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It’s 2016, and everyone can pretty much agree that the world is going to hell in a handbasket. And now, to add insult to injury, a new product has hit the market that allows you to pull your rolling suitcase around using only your butt. Yes, I repeat: The butt suitcase is a thing now.


Robert Lian, a pilot, invented My Hitch after he wanted an option for hands-free travel — not realizing that it may bring back haunting memories of the time your parents made you use a rolling backpack in the sixth grade after they read a study that suggested regular backpacks were bad for your back (I shall carry this pain forever, Mom and Dad).

You know what? I have no will left in me to fight back against this crazy thing. The butt suitcase is here to stay, and there’s nothing we can do about it.

The Butt Suitcase Is Here, and We Must Accept It