Most people are fortunate enough to walk through life without ever getting a spider bite on their genitals — but not Jordan, a 21-year-old Australian man who chose to be identified with just his first name, for obvious reasons. In the past five months he’s twice used a portable toilet only to find himself bitten right on the penis by a venomous spider.
On the plus side, Jordan is now responsible for one of the finest quotes to ever appear on the BBC:
“I was sitting on the toilet doing my business and just felt the sting that I felt the first time. I was like ‘I can’t believe it’s happened again.’ I looked down and I’ve seen a few little legs come from around the rim.”
He’s since been treated for his redback spider bite and discharged from the hospital — and now has a great story for every time he has to do a “two truths and a lie” icebreaker.