A Perfect ‘Fancy’ White Tee

Photo: Nina Merikallio

Let me just rip this Band-Aid off straightaway: this white, cotton T-shirt costs $125. “Not worth it,” you’re probably thinking, and you wouldn’t exactly be wrong. I can’t argue that this is a rational purchase. Hanes cost a mere $10 for a three-pack.

This is, after all, the “treat yourself” column, so judge as you will, but if I had $125 to burn, I’d spend it on this. In fact, if I had exactly $375 to spend, I’d buy my own 3-pack of these just so I’d know I’d never be without this white T-shirt ever again. Here’s why: This T-shirt gets everything right. It’s just opaque enough — not so thick that your boobs feel suffocated, and not so sheer that you have to think about your bra. It’s the right amount of soft — the Hanes might take seven years to get to this level of rose-petal softness and would be a lovely, dishwater grey by then. The sleeves fall exactly where they should, halfway between the fatty part of my upper arm and the top of my elbow, and maintain their tubular shape like a classic white men’s tee, but are cut generously enough to keep them from clinging. The neck hole opens with the thinnest of seams, revealing the right amount of clavicle. The length of the body is not so long it bunches up when tucked into high-waisted pants, but not so short it rides up when worn with lower-slung jeans.

Some people might think that wealth and status are best displayed by wearing gold watches and gowns. Not me. My idea of being rich is having so much money that you can afford to be like, “I brush my teeth with Perrier and buy T-shirts for $125.” Because, really, a perfect white T-shirt is the platonic ideal of clothing. Just ask Jane Birkin. She wore a lot of white tees and she has an Hermès bag named after her. That’s all the proof I require. She would probably not spend $125 on a white tee, but she’s French and I’m an American plebe, so that’s my cross to bear.

Samuji Cousin T-shirt

Note: This shirt is now available for 50% off at Garmentory.

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A Perfect ‘Fancy’ White Tee