new age

Rich Businessmen Find New Useless Thing to Spend Money On: Healing Crystals

Crystals, a regular fixture in your New Age aunt’s Arizona home, are everywhere now. Celebrities love them. Subscription box services will ship them to your home. Lengthy and vicious feuds have been fought over them. And now, rich businessmen are getting on the crystal bandwagon.

Per a trend piece in the New York Post, these dudes are spending tens of thousands of dollars on healing crystals to help them in matters of both love and money. Colleen McCann, Goop’s favorite energy practitioner, says her clients are  “people who run hedge funds, who work on Wall Street. These are guys who are running businesses and handling all these people’s money.” Robert Teixaira, manager of a gem store, adds “I’ve had millionaires come in here and [they] are totally into the crystal powers. These are CEOs of companies.” (Good thing we’re paying these guys 300x the average worker’s salary!)

One real estate agent, Eli, is even quoted as saying, “If I’m on the phone with a client, I’ll hold the crystal — a citrine — to connect to its energy.”

Now, which crystal will stave off the next financial crisis?

Rich Businessmen Are Obsessed With Healing Crystals