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A U.K. Supermarket Is Hiring a ‘Chicken Nugget Connoisseur’

Chicken nuggets.

Are you a fried poultry expert who is tired of having to chicken-splain nuggets to your so-called “friends”? Do you swirl and whiff the rich bouquet of your dipping sauce before gently lowering in each golden-brown hunk of breaded-chicken product? Do you believe your career should be your passion, and your passion should be your career? Then do I have the job for you!

Last week, the U.K. supermarket chain B&M announced that it was hiring a temporary Chicken Nugget Connoisseur based in Merseyside to help them expand their range of fresh and frozen food. According to their job description — which reads like a parody of the goofy sidekick in a rom-com who is only slightly chubby but their whole shtick is that they’re hungry all the time — relevant experience includes but is not limited to:

-Getting the 20 share box of nuggets from McDonalds and keeping them all for yourself 

-Being the first in the office kitchen whenever someone says there’s cake

-That time you tripped and fell at a buffet and saved the plate before yourself

-Going to an event or party because there is free food

-You value the importance of a fish finger sandwich in life

-You can conduct a power point presentation on the reasoning behind curly fries being nicer than chips

What exactly do you get for consuming medically questionable amounts of frozen fried foods?

The successful individual will receive £25 vouchers monthly to spend on fresh and frozen food in their local B&M store and can share their feedback with the B&M buying to help evolve the range. 

So, you may not make your fortune off nugget sampling. You can always take a page out of the KFC heiress’s book, and start designing lingerie instead.

A U.K. Supermarket Is Hiring a ‘Chicken Nugget Connoisseur’