personal essays

14 Hilarious Reactions to the ‘Jewish Rebellion’ Essay

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Today in Bad Things That Happened on the Internet, writer Carey Purcell published a ‘Why I’m Leaving New York Essay’ for the Washington Post — except instead of being about leaving New York, it’s about why she’s done dating Jewish men.

Sorry, Jewish men!!!!

As Purcell writes in the piece, she is a total catch: a self-proclaimed WASP who is “blond, often wear[s] pearls and can mix an excellent, and very strong, martini.” Yet despite these qualities, all two of her past Jewish boyfriends have broken up with her.

Overlooking the many personal reasons that her relationships may have ended, Purcell points instead to a fundamental Jewish-guy prejudice against flaxen-haired, Martini-swilling shiksa goddesses like herself. After citing the interference of one man’s “overbearing” Jewish mother, she concludes that she had served as these boyfriends’ “last act of defiance against cultural or familial expectations before finding someone who warranted their parents’ approval — perhaps the equivalent of a woman dating a motorcycle-driving, leather-jacket wearing ‘bad boy’ before settling down with a banker with a 9-5 job.”

Predictably, people on the internet had plenty to say in response:


14 Hilarious Reactions to the ‘Jewish Rebellion’ Essay