the perfect candle

The Perfect Candle for Adults Who Insist on Saying ‘Veggies’

Photo: Courtesy of brand.

Every candle is perfect for someone. The Perfect Candle is a weekly review of new candles that lets you know for whom, and why.

Ultimately, there is too much “going on,” so to speak, to judge adults who insist on saying “veggies” rather than “vegetables.” Perhaps there was a time in the past when we could have looked down our noses at friends who say, for example, “I’ve been eating sooo much junk food lately, I gotta get my hands on some yummy veggies,” but at this point we just have to allow it; if calling vegetables “veggies” brings our friend some peace, then more power to our friend. We must meet this friend with compassion. “Veggies” it is.

As a peace offering, I’d like to present the newly released “Stalker” candle from the millennial-pink, Instagram-friendly, sold-in-Creatures-of-Comfort-if-that-gives-you-an-idea candle brand Boy Smells. The name “Stalker,” while, ah, interesting, is meant to evoke not the type of stalker it may immediately bring to mind (classic stalker) but instead a celery stalk, one of the candle’s main notes. Okay, whatever you say. Here is how Boy Smells describes the candle:

Stalker has nice stems. Named after its foremost ingredient, this celery stalk is a fresh fragrance that is both botanical and earthy, thanks to its roots in parsley and purple carrots. Cumin, oud, and patchouli mix with peppery top notes, while blackberry and saffron round out the middle. This is a farmers’ market instilled in wax form.

Of course, a farmers’ market instilled in wax form sounds potentially good depending on your taste, and it certainly sounds good to me. But is it? Let’s see.

Is the candle good?

Early yesterday morning, after lighting this candle and immediately leaving the house to take my dog for a walk, oops, I returned to an apartment that smelled pretty good. “Why does it smell good in here?” I wondered. I attributed the scent to my open windows before realizing I’d absent-mindedly lit the candle right before leaving the house, which is both a fire and occupational hazard. Whoops. “My bad,” to quote Cher in Clueless. It does smell pretty good, though, and a lot like celery hand soap.

It isn’t a particularly weird scent, if that’s what you’re thinking. It’s normal. Like when you visit a restaurant and use their hand soap and come back to the table and you think, “Who smells good?” And then you realize it’s your hands, and the restaurant just had an unexpected soap scent. In general I guess “Stalker” is a good smell that also serves as a little mystery.

How much does it cost, and how long will it last?

The candle costs a fairly affordable $29, plus you can Instagram it, and faves are priceless. A burn time isn’t listed but at 8.8 oz I would guess 50 hours or so.

When should you burn this candle?

It is a candle that would be nice to burn immediately after cleaning your apartment, probably on a Sunday afternoon. This isn’t to say that you should burn it while cleaning. There are candles that are good to burn while cleaning that sort of enhance the idea of cleaning, like a lemon verbena, but this isn’t one of those. This would better enhance the experience of sitting in a home that is newly clean. It’s fresh and interesting, something that will make a guest ask — “Are you, uh … making (?) … celery soap?”

Who should buy this candle?

Anyone in soft, flowing fabric who loves to nibble on yummy veggies they got from their favorite stall at the farmers’ market. Or just you, if you like the idea of celery hand soap.

Boy Smells Stalker Scented Candle
$29 at Nordstrom

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The Perfect Candle for Adults Who Insist on Saying ‘Veggies’