who among us?

Local Raccoons Not Rabid, Just Extremely Drunk

A raccoon.
Photo: ullstein bild via Getty Images

The No. 1 word association people have with raccoons is “rabies.” (No. 2, 3, and 4 are: adorable, garbage, tiny little grabby hands.) So it’s no surprise that when residents of Milton, West Virginia, saw raccoons acting erratically, they assumed the worst.

But when police officers caught them, they realized the issue was far less severe: the raccoons were just drunk because they ate too many fermented crabapples. (Am I right, ladies?)

“We have had calls on suspected rabid raccoons twice over the last two days. Turns out they appear to be drunk on crabapples,” the Milton police department posted on Facebook. “If you see a staggering and disoriented raccoon please do not approach it.”

Raise a glass to yet another animal who loves to party.

Local Raccoons Not Rabid, Just Extremely Drunk