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How to Resolve Conflict, According to Vanderpump Rules

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Most people have let a relationship go to waste. Maybe it was lost due to a perceived slight, or an intended one; maybe it fell to the wayside due to a foundational shift too seismic to manage. Or maybe you let the relationship drop after your DJ friend insulted the weight of the wife of your co–minority stakeholder in the West Hollywood bar Lisa Vanderpump opened in your name.

This is where you and Tom Sandoval differ.

Page Six” asked Sandoval (the “Tom” half of Tom Tom) how the cast of Vanderpump Rules manages to maintain their friendships through all of their downs and downs — through cheating on each other, slapping each other in the face, pouring drinks on each other, calling each other whores. How do they do it?

“I think a lot of that has to do with the situation that we’re in,” he said, correctly pinpointing the fact that they do it because they have to be on a TV show together all the time. “Normally when you have a falling out with friends you usually come back around — maybe you don’t — but a lot of times there’s a distance … but with us, we’re in a situation where we’re around each other. We’re involved in each other’s lives.”

Calling to mind The Simpsons explanation for why Mr. Burns is still alive even though he has every disease, he added: “After a while, it becomes exhausting to hang on to animosity.” Indeed it must.

Tom Schwartz (the “Tom” half of Tom Tom) was also there with “Page Six” to answer the question. “I feel like we’re constantly evolving and then devolving and then trying to evolve again and then evolving even further,” he said. “The waters run deep with this group. We have so much history together, so much love — sometimes hate — but almost always love prevails.”

Schwartz should probably hold a little bit more of a grudge against DJ James Kennedy for insulting his wife’s weight in the last episode and previously, but of course that’s none of my business. To recap, here is how to maintain a friendship:

• Have to for your job.
• Have to because otherwise the overwhelming amount of animosity would cause you to crumble from the inside out.
• Be Tom Schwartz.

Thank you, Toms! I love you!!!

How to Resolve Conflict, According to Vanderpump Rules