What’s going on with Brad Pitt and Charlize Theron? That’s the question every tabloid is attempting to answer this week, after The Sun reported on Sunday that the not-quite-divorced-yet actor has been “romancing” Theron since Christmas. For context, The Sun is a British tabloid that’s had some big hits (the paper published those wondrous first paparazzi shots of Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston in 2016), but it’s generally unreliable. So what’s the deal here?
According to The Sun, Pitt met Theron through her ex-boyfriend Sean Penn. “They have been casually seeing each other for nearly a month now,” a source told the tabloid. “They’ve been friends for some time — ironically through Sean — but things have developed.” This is a red flag for me: Theron and Penn’s 2015 breakup was notoriously bad, and rumor has it that she completely cut off contact with him afterward. So if they did meet through Penn, it would have been years ago. The rest of the Sun story goes on to say that Pitt and Theron were spotted together recently at the Chateau Marmont. No pictures. Hmm.
But wait: there is incontrovertible evidence that Pitt and Theron have spent time together. Because — surprise! — they shot an ad for Breitling watches together last year. (Adam Driver was there, too.) The campaign was released last September, though I don’t remember hearing anything about it then. Congratulations to Breitling.
Does this sort of sexy watch #ad mean Pitt and Theron are in love? According to Pitt’s favorite tabloid, People: Unclear. On Monday, the magazine published this quote from a source: “About six months ago, they did a shoot together. So they have spent time together. But anything that may have happened beyond that remains to be seen.” But then, as the perfect gossip blog Celebitchy points out, the editors have updated the quote. It now reads: “About six months ago, they did a shoot together. They have not been out together recently, and were never dating. Reports of them being involved romantically are false.” Just when things were starting to get interesting, somebody’s publicist called up People and shut the whole thing down.
Now, Entertainment Tonight, which is often very complimentary to Pitt, is reporting that Pitt would never date another actress, anyway. Oh really? Not even @charlizeafrica? If I had to guess, I’d say that Theron’s camp was the one to issue the denial, and now Pitt is trying to save face.
So who fed this dating rumor to the Sun in the first place? And why did they do it this week? Close readers of the New York Times’ “Vows” column already know. On Saturday, a day before the Pitt-Theron story was published, the Times ran a beautiful story about the wedding of Pitt’s most recent tabloid love interest, Neri Oxman. You remember Oxman, right? She’s the internationally acclaimed architect/designer/MIT professor who was supposedly smitten with Pitt for two months last spring. Except now she’s married to billionaire investor Bill Ackman, and according to the Times, they’re expecting their first child together.
Well, guess what? Brad Pitt is dating Charlize Theron! Or wait, he’s not. Anyway, buy a watch.
In more distressing wedding news, Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin have postponed their big Christian wedding again. According to TMZ, Bieber and Baldwin notified their 300 invitees yesterday that their planned February 28 bash will be rescheduled. Apparently, it’s hard to get all of your family and friends to commit to a date on a few weeks notice, even if you’re a celebrity. “We’re told the Biebers got some regrets back from certain loved ones who couldn’t make it to Los Angeles … so it’s back to the drawing board,” says TMZ.
Now, Bieber and Baldwin are considering a “destination wedding,” which would help them narrow down the guest list. To that I say: No, no, no. I need all of the Kardashians and Hadids and Baldwins in one place that is easily accessible to paparazzi. And what’s going to happen to that rumored Vogue shoot? This is a mess.
One small blessing from this week:
Taylor Swift is actually doing this Cats movie, it seems. Wow!
And here’s an interesting blind item from this week, care of Enty at Crazy Days and Nights:
“On the way to an award show last night, this former singer turned television actress was rude to her driver and refused to call him by his name. She just kept saying driver.”
This could be about so many people. Who do you think was rude?
Finally, I’ll leave you with this photo of Leo DiCaprio, 44, walking into a lunch date with his dad, stepmom, and 21-year-old model girlfriend Cami Morrone this week. Do you think he takes the hoodie off when he gets to the table?