Tonight is the 91st Academy Awards or, as you may know it, the night Rachel Weisz wore a red latex Givenchy gown that sent women around the globe into paroxysms of lust, causing them to claw desperately at their faces and howl at the stars, begging the heavens, please, for the love of God, to let Rachel Weisz to spit on them. And step on them, and top them, and run them over, and rail them, and just generally sexually subject them.
The spitting, specifically, is in reference to Weisz’s film Disobedience, which includes a scene where she spits in Rachel McAdams mouth during sex. That bit of saliva sparked one million fantasies, and along with her role in The Favourite, established Weisz as a lesbian icon.
“Every day, it seems we find new and innovative ways that we want Weisz to harm us — like, I want Rachel Weisz to shoot and explode a bird on my face, just to feel something (just spitballing here),” Jill Gutowitz wrote in a piece for Broadly titled “How Rachel Weisz Became the Unofficial Straight LGBTQ Ambassador”.
“I would like her to run me over with a Ferrari, so I could be destroyed by all that is sleek and beautiful,” journalist Talia Lavin, one of the many women who took to Twitter to express their yearning for Weisz, told the Cut, adding, “The impulse to worship can also be an impulse towards self abnegation.”
The Weisz adulation is specific. It is not merely a crush; it is a desire to have Weisz command you absolutely. The Cut’s Opheli Garcia Lawler said she’s been a fan of Weisz’s since her role as a U.N. whistle-blower in the 2010 film The Whistleblower, and that by the time The Favourite came out, “I had already accepted her gospel and was willing to let her boss me around, manage my life, and make fun of my makeup.”
Fashion writer Sarah Spellings said that while her boyfriend “was very early on the whole crushing on Rachel Weisz thing,” it was Weisz’s Oscars ensemble this evening that pushed her over the edge. “The headband and the latex is really what does it for me. The balance of the prissy headband with the dominatrix-y latex capelet just makes me very pleased from a sartorial and sexual perspective.”
Weisz did not win the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress tonight, and all I have to say about that is: Rachel, please … run me over.
