If you’ve made it all the way to season eight of Game of Thrones, then you know by now that there’s a level of violence and gore to be expected. Still, there was one moment in last night’s premiere episode wherein my husband Tormund Giantsbane and my other husband Beric Dondarrion stumbled upon a particularly gruesome scene: House Umber had been raided by the Army of the Dead, and its 10-year-old lord was killed and pinned to a wall, surrounded by a perfectly arranged spiral of body parts. No, I will not be including a picture!!!
My one main question after seeing this deeply fucked up sculpture was: how did the Night King even make this happen? More specifically: Did he stop the entire Army of the Dead so that he could carefully and deliberately pin the limbs to the wall, one by one? How long did that take him? Did he use artist’s assistants (wights) to execute his vision? Are they getting paid fairly? If he was doing it solo, was everyone like ugh, Night King, we have to keep going on our quest to kill everyone in Westeros while he was like you guys NEED to respect my PROCESS? Was he consulting a Pinterest tutorial, or did he sketch it out beforehand? Separately, do you think Tormund wants to kiss? Does the Night King consider himself an “outsider artist”?
And finally: does anyone have any tips for fully erasing this from my brain?