keeping up with kylie

I Can’t Keep Up With Kylie Anymore

Kylie Jenner. Photo: DIMITRIOS KAMBOURIS/Getty Images for The Met Museum/

Keeping up with Kylie is getting increasingly more difficult, as the billionaire seems unrelenting in her quest for total beauty-world domination. Just last Friday, Jenner confirmed that yes, Kylie Jenner is launching Kylie skin-care products. They will live under a brand named Kylie Skin by Kylie Jenner, or “KYLIE F*CKING SKIN! wow,” as she put it perfectly.

Kylie Skin officially drops on May 22 and we know a lot of things about it now, like it’s aggressively millennial pink, six products wide (plus wipes), and features Jenner’s “secret” to good skin, which aren’t celebrity dermatologists or fancy procedures, but a walnut face scrub she made just for you.

While the internet was just starting to school Jenner on why the public maybe shouldn’t be scrubbing their faces with walnut remnants, even if they’re allegedly superior Kylie Skin remnants, WWD reported that Jenner had already gone ahead and filed trademarks for “Kylie Baby” and “Kylie Baby by Kylie Jenner” with the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office. Keep up!!! According to WWD, both trademarks were filed for “baby and infant products across clothing, skin-care and lifestyle categories,” including “bath and shower products, diapers, baby food, nursing products, strollers, baby carriers, bath linens, crib sheets.”

Before Twitter even had a chance to pivot and ask what “baby skin care” entails and whether it also involves walnuts, WWD reported that Jenner went ahead and filed two more trademarks for “Kylie Hair” and “Kylie Hair by Kylie Jenner.” According to WWD, these two were filed for hair-care products such as “hair brushes, electrically heated hair brushes, hair combs, hair dryers, curling irons, shampoos, conditioners, hair-care preparations, hair masks, dry shampoo and hair dye.”

The nonstop barrage of beauty trademark filing is reminiscent of the harrowing Fenty Beauty product-drop onslaught of the first week of May. Are fans also annoying Jenner about releasing a new album instead of playing with makeup? Is this an attempt to help Kendall focus her currently broad and vague beauty line, because there will be nothing left to choose from? Please, Kylie, have mercy; save some for “Kendall”!!!

I Can’t Keep Up With Kylie Anymore