Look at This Real-Life Sims Blunder

Oh. Photo: Courtesy of Compass Pools

There are so many mistakes to make in Sims, the life simulation game in which you create people, build enormous, impractical houses for them using ill-gotten money, make them have sex, and then eventually abandon them. You can forget to install smoke detectors, or not put in a toilet in your Sim’s house. But don’t forget: There are many mistakes to be made in real life, too, like forgetting to install smoke detectors, or not putting a toilet in your own house, or building a bowel-twisting infinity pool at the top of a skyscraper without any visible point of exit, as CNN reports the company Compass Pools is planning to do in London.

The company’s mock-up, which you can see up there, shows a large, square, clear-sided pool high in the sky over London, with three people in it, including one standing alone near the edge, gazing blankly into the foggy distance of the city and his soul.

The 600,000 liter, 360-degree infinity pool at the top of a 55-story building would be the first of its kind, Compass claims. Sure. Okay. Cool. But how do you get into it, and then out of it again once you’re done enjoying the view and peeing?

“We faced some quite major technical challenges to this building, the biggest one being how to actually get into the pool,” Compass Pool’s designer and technical director Alex Kemsley said in an interview on the company’s website. “Normally a simple ladder would suffice, but we didn’t want stairs on the outside of the building or in the pool as it would spoil the view — and obviously you don’t want 600,000 litres of water draining through the building either.” Yes. Obviously. So what was the solution?

“The solution is based on the door of a submarine, coupled with a rotating spiral staircase which rises from the pool floor when someone wants to get in or out — the absolute cutting edge of swimming pool and building design and a little bit James Bond to boot!”

Hm. I have never been in a submarine, personally, but I did watch the 2018 film The Meg, which includes this, submarine-based scene:

Seems too dangerous for a pool, in my opinion. Construction of the pool is set to begin in 2020, “if partners and contractors are confirmed.” No word yet on whether Jason Statham will be involved at all.

Look at This Real-Life Sims Blunder