Who Said It: Roman Roy or Stassi Schroeder?

Roman Roy and Stassi Schroeder. Photo: HBO, Getty Images

On the surface, Succession and Vanderpump Rules are two very different shows. Succession is a scripted cable comedy-drama about the megawealthy family behind a global media conglomerate in New York, and Vanderpump Rules is a reality-TV show about a group of sexy, unique restaurant staff in West Hollywood. At their cores, however, the two shows have a lot in common. They both feature an ensemble cast made up of self-obsessed, emotionally fragile characters who are constantly consumed by complex interpersonal dramas of their own making, and vying for the approval of a mercurial, withholding authority figure.

Also, they both include one character with a penchant for florid language and disturbing, violent imagery that they deploy liberally against their friends, enemies, and strangers. In the case of Succession, it’s tiny failson Roman Roy, and in the case of Vanderpump Rules, it’s white-wine queen bee Stassi Schroeder.

Can you tell the various expletive-laden insults of these two apart? Take the quiz below to find out.

Who Said It: Roman or Stassi?

"It's my birthday, so go fuck yourself."
"I want to wrap a dildo in acid, and give it to her as a present, so that it tears out her insides."
"I'm dumb, but I'm smart."
"Oh, I think just fuck off, thanks."
"Rich people annoy me."
"Well, then, you kill me, you chop my dick off, you know, something. I’m kidding, but you know what I’m saying. You eat me, I eat you, like they do in Germany."
"I’d rather light one of my arms on fire than go to something as boring as a puppy shower."
"Oh, yeah, it was very compelling. It was like eye crack."
"Here’s a news story for you: Elderly local man doesn’t realize he’s getting butt fucked by Google."
"I literally just want to take every fork and knife, and graze over his body until he bleeds to death."
"I am the devil, and don't you forget it."
"Generally speaking, people don't like you."
"I normally would’ve literally ran across that float with daggers, and not only stabbed you both, like, 40 times, but then thrown you off, tarred and feathered each of you, beheaded you, and quartered your bodies."
"Well, what do the normos like? What do you like?"
BONUS ROUND. Who said it, Logan Roy or Lisa Vanderpump? "You're not important enough to hate ... sit down."

Who Said It: Roman Roy or Stassi Schroeder?