internal conflict

Brad Pitt Grabs Jennifer Aniston’s Wrist, Causes Widespread Emotional Chaos

Hmmmm. Photo: Emma McIntyre/Getty Images for Turner

Picture this: The year is 2005, and you have been utterly gutted by a celebrity divorce, specifically Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston’s celebrity divorce. What’s more, Brad has just dumped salt in your open wounds by getting together with Angelina Jolie, leaving Jen to — or so it appeared at the time — piece together the full story from various entertainment news reports. It stings.

Flash forward 15 years, and we find ourselves backstage at the 2020 SAG Awards. Both actors have split from their respective interim partners. The rumors that have been percolating about their revived friendship hit a fever pitch when the high-profile exes share A Moment. A conspicuously tender moment; a moment instigated by Brad grabbing Jen’s wrist as she walks away from him, as if all his mistakes had just crystallized inside his brain; a moment that sparks — joy? hope? a flicker of vindication, of triumph? A real emotional rollercoaster for the Brad and Jen shippers, you will agree.

Look at this photo. How do you feel? Photo: Emma McIntyre/Getty Images for Turner

On the one hand, you could look at this photo and appreciate it for one thing that it is: a not-really-news-event that provides a brief respite from the exhausting content churn in which we otherwise exist. Wild to be back in the 90s, no?

And with New York Times dropping its presidential endorsement (spoiler, it’s Elizabeth Warren AND Amy Klobuchar) this morning — an event all but guaranteed to tear apart your timeline — you could choose to just…look at these jokes for a little bit.

And maybe also some memes, just for good measure.

On the other hand, you could simply let yourself feel this. I mean yeah, it was years ago. Years and years and years ago. And yeah, everyone has moved on, including the two people involved. But…still.

On yet another hand, you could choose neither to forgive nor forget, because Brad had a very public affair and that is, at least ostensibly, the main reason they broke up. What business does he have, getting all grabby now?

On this other hand way over here, do you think it feels sort of nice to be Jen right now, with your shitty ex grasping after you as you stroll away to accept a big award?

And said ex is just standing there in awe like:

Whatever. Nostalgia, baby.

This article has been updated with more amusing reactions.

Brad Pitt Causes Widespread Emotional Chaos