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Could This Be the Most British Scandal of All Time?

Nigella Lawson and buttered toast.
The perpetrator and the scene of the crime. Photo: Getty Images

What a beautiful day to take a hop, skip, and a jump across the pond to check in on our British mates, see how they’re doing, get the latest. Any new misbehaving animals, or better yet, fresh WAGs drama? Oh, wait, what is this now? The people are riled up over a piece of toast, you say? Buttered not once, but twice?

Allow me to elaborate, for their sake: This isn’t just any run-of-the-mill piece of toast, but rather, one prepared by the esteemed cookbook author and TV personality Nigella Lawson, who recently demonstrated how she prepares her “platonic ideal of toast” on her BBC show, Nigella’s Eat, Cook, Repeat. So how does she do it? Well, she starts off with any piece of “old-fashioned sandwich loaf,” and then takes a “two-stage buttering approach.” When the bread is still hot from the toaster, she slathers on one layer of unsalted butter, and then, once it’s cooled down just a tad, she adds another layer, followed by a sprinkle of salt.

Almost immediately, the nation went into an uproar. Some were outraged that Nigella would teach something as obvious as buttering toast, one of Britain’s most beloved activities (“Five minutes I will never get back #toast #nigella,” huffed one); others were taken aback at the technique itself. Indeed, the Telegraph ran her method by a panel of accomplished chefs, and none of them endorsed it. In Lawson’s defense, I don’t think the two-layer technique is conventional, so I’d counter that her viewers did learn something new. (Some were appreciative of the insight, with one Twitter user calling it “inspirational.”)

Anyway, glad to see that we’re all doing well, mentally, physically, and spiritually.

Could This Be the Most British Scandal of All Time?