Last night’s Euphoria went as expected: All your faves continued their journey of making really bad decisions — except for, somewhat surprisingly but not really, the crew’s resident armed 13-year-old. Ashtray (Javon “Wanna” Walton) has once again proved he is the GOAT and that he has Fezco’s (Angus Cloud) back no matter what. His decision-making skills in this episode were impeccable, and that’s saying a lot for a prepubescent boy with face tats.
As soon as Cal makes fun of Fez, calling him a “tough guy,” Ashtray hits him upside the head with the back of a shotgun. “I’m warning you: If you hit me again …” Cal says before Ashtray hits him again, unfazed, over and over again. “All right. Chill out, man,” Fez says in a monotonic voice. Ashtray may be in middle school, but he’s smart. He figures out that Cal doesn’t want the cops involved and calls him on his bluff. “Dial, bitch,” he says. This leads to Cal confessing that he slept with Jules and recorded it.
By Euphoria standards, this is a happy ending: Cal realizes the truth, Fez gets Cal to agree to make Nate leave him alone, and no one gets shot. And our hero, Ashtray, reaffirms he will do anything to protect his brother and their business. It’s the sort of sibling love I want, and the world seems to agree.
Ash’s steady chill and undying loyalty, mixed with the unhinged glee that comes with watching a literal child commit serious crimes, has the internet falling in love and feeling weird about it. So, to the Euphoria writers: More Ashtray content, please! Eventually, I’d love to see him without a gun and doing something normal for a 13-year-old — like, I don’t know, homework. But until then, more violence from a child toward bad adults will do.