Big news for lit freaks: A-Rod — as in retired Yankee Alexander Rodriguez and/or J.Lo’s formerly bereft ex-fiancé — is writing a “BOOK”! Or he was, or he thought about it for one ambitious moment a couple of weeks ago … Anyway, he was serious enough about the idea to grab a stack of A-Rod-branded letterhead and make an Instagram Story. The photo showed a pile of loose papers propped against his bare li’l hot-dog legs with “BOOK” scrawled across the top and underlined for gravitas. The caption announces that he has “decided to start writing,” only he apparently hadn’t gotten very far at the time of posting. We are staring at the blank page, and the blank page is staring right back. Book. BOOK. BoOk! What now? What next?
Speaking from personal experience, I would say the best thing to do when you are feeling overwhelmed by the magnitude of the task at hand, or the unwieldy volume of thoughts inside your head, is to just do something, start somewhere, get something down. (BOOK!) And it’s possible that A-Rod has some sentences, a page, even multiple pages written by now, because he actually sent this image out into the world in mid-February. Somehow it crossed my timeline only yesterday thanks to comedy writer Broti Gupta, and now I am wondering what topics A-Rod will address in his big BOOK. What sort of book will BOOK be? Will it be a memoir, in which he finally discusses, in heartrending detail, the rift that led to his breakup with J.Lo in early 2021? The discovery (I’m fantasizing here) of a cache of flirty emails that signaled the demise of his engagement? The rumors that, actually, he was cheating on J. Lo, and that’s what doomed their relationship? How he got over that split and found love again with a fitness instructor? His “big darling energy”? The two paintings of himself as a centaur that are (or were) said to hang in his Manhattan apartment, one of them over his bed?
At present, it’s impossible to say precisely what BOOK will cover because A-Rod does not appear to have written a single word except, of course, “BOOK.” Still, the caption suggests a direction: “lessons learned in business & baseball.” Mercifully, there’s still time to change course.
