Rihanna doesn’t get excited about much these days, and I get it. When you’ve headlined the Super Bowl halftime show pregnant and annihilated the Met Gala carpet while birthing yourself from the middle of a bunch of fabric roses, you’re allowed to get a little jaded about the mundanity of daily life. Except the mundanity of daily life for someone like Rihanna is getting hot and bothered over A$AP Rocky’s parenting skills and sitting front row at couture shows at Paris Fashion Week.
But on Monday, Rihanna flew into an out-of-character tizzy when she bumped into Natalie Portman outside the Dior Haute Couture show in Paris. The two squealed and hugged before launching into an A-list celebrity compliment battle, which would make for a compelling reality concept, I think.
“You’re one of the hottest bitches in Hollywood forever,” Rihanna told the May December actor. “You do the most innocent look and I’m like AHHHH.”
“I’m gonna faint. I’m gonna black out. I … I love you,” Portman said. “I listen to your music all the time.”
A totally reciprocated Hollywood girl crush? Yeah, this is exactly how I wanted my Monday to go. Though I’d argue that together they are two of the hottest bitches in Hollywood forever, the mutual fangirls posed for a few paparazzi photos before hugging once more, as Rih reiterated that she doesn’t “get excited” about “anybody.” And Natalie Portman — the Nina Sayers of Black Swan, the Queen Amidala of Star Wars and literal “mother” of Luke Skywalker — isn’t just anybody.
Mostly, I’m just glad to know that famous people also lose their marbles over Rihanna. And while Portman didn’t actually black out, I almost certainly would. A round of applause for Natalie’s composure and to all a good night!