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The Wedding Files

When we ask newlyweds to think back on what they wanted most for their big day — and we’ve interviewed hundreds of them over the years — the most common response is “For it not to feel like a wedding!” Gathering with old friends and eating mini grilled cheeses in formalwear to celebrate love feels more special these days than ever, even downright miraculous. And the betrothed have never been less attached to the old wedding handbook — or the need to please their great-aunt. So in a flurry of pampas grass and perfectly mismatched-to-match bridesmaid dresses, how do you pull off a non-cookie-cutter affair? For the answers, we decided to interrogate the cool couples whose weddings we would actually want to steal, right down to the tiger-shaped cake toppers.

the wedding files

The Wedding Files: Saying ‘I Do’ in a Torrential Downpour

 Everything but the brides’ spirits ended up dampened. By Kaitlin Menza

more from 'the wedding files'

  1. the wedding files
    The Event Planner Who Didn’t Want to Overplan Her WeddingThe result: an elopement and an intimate backyard ceremony among the wildflowers followed by lunch at Chez Panisse.
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  2. the wedding files
    A Desert Wedding With Barbecue and a Bounce House“We wanted people to feel like it was worth flying to Utah for.”
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  3. the wedding files
    This Effortlessly Cool Wedding Came Together in Two WeeksA City Hall ceremony for two people who made New York their adoptive home.
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  4. the wedding files
    C x A | Let's Get Lost | E.P. Stereo
    A Lisbon Wedding Fit for a Palace“There were a bazillion rooms,” and “every single one was a work of art. It felt like Night at the Museum.”
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  5. the wedding files
    A Cobble Hill Wedding With an Air of Goodfellas“What if we could keep everything super-local and only go to places we can walk to?”
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  6. the wedding files
    A Wedding for the Girls and the GaysWith an after-party at a queer rave in a Bushwick warehouse.
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  7. the wedding files
    In the City That Never Sleeps, a Wedding That Never EndsZabar’s for breakfast, the Odeon for dinner, and partying at the Boom Boom Room all night.
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  8. the wedding files
    A Newark Wedding With No Fewer Than 3 DJ SetsIn a former transformer factory in Newark, guests enjoyed vegan soul food and plenty of pre-batch cocktails.
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  9. the wedding files
    A ‘Western Chic’ Wedding in the WoodsThe groom jumped the gun and immediately said, “I do!” during their vows.
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  10. the wedding files
    A Vibrant Chinatown WeddingThe grooms celebrated their love, their shared culture, and the community they’ve built in New York City.
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  11. the wedding files
    How an Attention-Averse Couple Gets Married“Every time we went to a wedding together, we’d be like, ‘I don’t want to be walking down an aisle with everyone staring at me.’”
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  12. the wedding files
    A Low-key Wedding for a Type-A Bride“Otherwise I would have stressed myself to death.”
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  13. the wedding files
    A Red-Sauce Joint, a Warehouse, and 6 Dessert OptionsHow a restaurant owner and a food publicist get married.
    As told to Kaitlin Menza
  14. the wedding files
    A DIY Wedding on Martha’s VineyardFriends supplied the flowers, the food, the oyster-shell calligraphy, and more.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  15. the wedding files
    A Gastrophile’s Dream WeddingAt the Michelin-starred Musket Room, guests dined on za’atar-fried quail and sweetbread.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  16. the wedding files
    A Cosmic, Future Nostalgia–Style Wedding in the Catskills“There aren’t a lot of Pinterest boards for ‘space disco.’”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  17. the wedding files
    ‘Gay Great Gatsby Meets Beauty and the Beast’ at This Plaza Wedding“We don’t like to do anything low-key.”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  18. the wedding files
    At Syndicated Theater, a Wedding Fit for FelliniThe bridesmaids were on stilts, the officiant was a drag performer, and an aerialist entertained during cocktail hour.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  19. the wedding files
    At Georgia O’Keeffe’s Ghost Ranch, an ‘Epic’ WeddingNo speeches, just dancing.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  20. the wedding files
    A Twice-Rescheduled Midweek Wedding in the Hudson Valley“We’re not really ‘farm wedding’ people, so that limited our options.”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  21. the wedding files
    A Brooklyn Waterfront Wedding That Was ‘Honestly Just a Hang’The bride prioritized working with vendors who were people of color.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  22. the wedding files
    A Jet-Age Wedding at the TWA Hotel“It would be like getting married in A Space Odyssey.”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  23. the wedding files
    The Design-Minded Couple Who Didn’t Want to Try Too HardThe bride got a wonderful surprise the morning of her wedding.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  24. the wedding files
    A Costa Rica Wedding During the Rainy SeasonThunder roared during the toasts.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  25. the wedding files
    A San Francisco Wedding at a Big, Empty PierThe bride changed into crushed-velvet pants for the disco-infused reception.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  26. the wedding files
    An Elopement Among the Lupines in IcelandThe late afternoon was spent snapping photos near waterfalls and black beaches.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  27. the wedding files
    A Pennsylvania Potluck for 280 People“I looked at her for the first time and had this feeling like, You. I know you.”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  28. the wedding files
    A Dance Party Under Puerto Rican Palm TreesBad Bunny blasted and pitorro flowed.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  29. the wedding files
    A Zoom Wedding Only Two Digital Creatives Could ProduceThe couple coordinated multiple video segments, breakout rooms, and a dance party.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  30. the wedding files
    The Anti-Spectacle Wedding That Turned Into a SpectacleBrooklyn Bridge Park was the site of their first date, proposal, and wedding.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  31. the wedding files
    A Night at the Philadelphia Museum of ArtThe flowers were specially treated to protect the masterpieces.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  32. the wedding files
    The Indian Wedding That Stopped Traffic on Fifth Avenue“Hordes and hordes of tourists were elbowing our family out of the way to film Tyler on the horse.”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  33. the wedding files
    A Tropical-Flowered Fête in Brooklyn“Our aim was ‘very colorful and very local.’”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  34. the wedding files
    How Two Foodies Get Married“The first time I remember him getting my attention, he burned me with a sheet tray.”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  35. the wedding files
    The Grooms Wore Masks at the Jersey ShoreTheir jobs made them uniquely aware of public health.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  36. the wedding files
    Two Stand-up Comedians Marry in Palm SpringsThe groom’s blazer was inspired by The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  37. the wedding files
    The Childhood Sweethearts Who Eloped to the MountainsTheir families joined later for hot pot and cake.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  38. the wedding files
    When the Bride Is Also a Cake Artist“I applied the sugar flowers in full hair and makeup.”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  39. the wedding files
    Two Exuberant Weddings Fusing Ethiopian and Nigerian TraditionsFrom a coffee ceremony in Maryland to churros in Mexico.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  40. the wedding files
    The Brides Served Umbrella Donuts and Balloon Cakes“I knew we were never going to get married if I didn’t do it my way.”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  41. the wedding files
    A Sparkly Wedding in a Greenhouse UpstateWith a confetti motif, from the save-the-dates to the favors.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  42. the wedding files
    A Wedding on 3 Hours’ Notice in a City Park“People in masks were applauding from a safe distance.”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  43. the wedding files
    A Joyous, Musical, Multicultural WeddingFrankies 457 pizza and masala-chai ice cream were served.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  44. the wedding files
    A California Wedding With Confetti CannonsThe groom crumpled up his vows mid-ceremony.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  45. the wedding files
    A Sangria-Fueled Community Wedding in BrooklynAnyone who felt moved to speak could take part in the ceremony.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  46. the wedding files
    A Wedding That Combined Brooklyn’s Oldest Synagogue and Its Wildest Nightclub“We wanted to throw the biggest party that we’d ever thrown.”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  47. the wedding files
    A Wedding in Los Angeles’ Most Beautiful BuildingThe groom got locked on a fire escape in pursuit of a good photo.
    By Kaitlin Menza
  48. the wedding files
    The Wedding That Resembled a Dutch Still Life“We wanted this to feel like the biggest dinner party we’ve ever thrown.”
    By Kaitlin Menza
  49. the wedding files
    How an Engagement Ring Designer Gets Married
    By Kaitlin Menza
  50. the wedding files
    A Scientist and a Minister Walk Into a Furniture StoreThe ceremony quoted Albert Einstein and Walt Whitman.
    By Kaitlin Menza
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